so i was cleaning out my moms basement and found this notebook from middle school that i completely forgot existed.
apparently 12 year old me thought he was some kind of philosopher or something because every entry starts with stuff like “today i realized something important about life” and then its just complete nonsense about how unfair it is that i have to brush my teeth every day.
like there was this whole 3 page rant about how adults are hypocrites because they tell kids to be themselves but then get mad when you wear the same shirt four days in a row.
which honestly still makes a little sense but the way i wrote it was so dramatic. “nobody understands the real me” type stuff. i kept reading and cringing harder with every page because this kid really thought he had it all figured out.
the best part was finding this elaborate plan i made to become popular by learning magic tricks. just pages and pages of strategy about how if i could make a pencil disappear everyone would think i was cool.
it did not work.
mainly because i never actually learned any magic tricks i just wrote about learning them which is basically my approach to everything even now.
but the weirdest thing was how confident i sounded about everything. like dead serious about how pokemon cards were a better investment than stocks and how my teacher was definitely a secret agent.
at least current me knows im an idiot most of the time. 12 year old me was just walking around completely wrong about everything with zero self doubt.
makes me wonder what im gonna think about current me in like 10 years. probably that i was an idiot for spending twenty minutes reading my own diary and then blogging about it.